It’s funny how sometimes beautiful gifts come wrapped in strange and unwelcome packages.
Right now feels like one of those times.
Most people have more time on their hands than what they would ever normally have. There are no commute times as people are working from home. No kids’ sporting commitments that take up a large chunk of the weekend. And no socialising.
This has resulted in a huge chunk of time being freed up for many of us, which is (hopefully) accompanied by a reduction in some of the stressors in our life.
Alongside that though, there is an increase in people who are spending this time in worry and fear because of job losses, financial strain, and an uncertain future generally speaking. I totally get that! It would be odd if, in the face of so much uncertainty, we humans didn’t see an increase in these emotions – we were wired for fear from the outset after all.
That is, unless we have trained during the good times in preparation for more challenging times.
For those of you who are outstanding at guarding your mind and the thoughts you allow to circulate up there, you are most probably doing well. For those who have not built any muscle around this sort of stuff, I predict you are quite consumed with trying to work out the lay of the land and what the hell is going on right now! Understandable.
But guess what? You can’t actually work this out. The only thing you can know for sure is that we are in a period of change and huge uncertainty. Be certain in that!
Many of my coaching conversations this week have been around finding certainty in uncertain times. My advice is that, to even begin achieving this goal you must look inward. To connect more deeply with yourself; to find things within that you know are true for you; to get grounded in your own knowledge of yourself, how you want to move forward, and the life you want to create.
Below is a list of questions to get you started in your quest to find certainty in yourself; to find out what you stand for and want out of life. Many of us don’t take the time to ask ourselves these great questions and we don’t ever truly understand what we think. For some people life is just too busy and there isn’t the time, whilst for others it may even seem indulgent.
However, the people out there who are flexing their muscles in these unforeseen and ever-changing times – ie. those who have certainty in themselves – have done just that. They know themselves and they know that ‘this too shall pass’. In fact, many of these people are seeing opportunity and expansion all around them right now…. all because they are backing themselves.
By getting clear on who you are, what you want, why you want it, and what to do next, I promise you that you will find more peace. And peace brings us space. Space can then be filled with – not what we don’t want to happen – but with precisely what we want to happen.
Grab a piece of paper or your journal and work through the below questions. Give yourself sufficient time to ponder them. Alternatively, do this as a family and ask each other the questions at the dinner table – maybe pick one or two per night. Your children will certainly learn a lot about you and you in turn will learn a lot about them – all whilst having some interesting and robust conversation!
Love and Connection
- What is most important to you?
- Who is most important to you?
- What are you inspired by? Why?
- Who are you inspired by? Why?
- When do you feel you are at your best and most alive?
- When was the last time that happened?
- What are you naturally good at? List five things.
- What special abilities do you have?
- What makes you smile and brings you abundant joy?
- What do you like about yourself?
Fear and Learnings
- What are you scared of right now?
- What mistakes have you learnt from?
- What was the key lesson you learnt?
- What hardships have you overcome?
- What mistake do you keep making that you are ready to let go of?
- What are your three greatest fears?
- How many times have you gotten through something you weren’t sure you would be able to get through?
- What do you want to ask for help with?
- Who can you ask?
- What do you want to forgive yourself for and let go of?
Expansion and The Future
- What do you really want for you future?
- What do you want to be remembered for?
- What areas in your life do you want to give the most attention to right now?
- What would doing that give you?
- Who do you want to be around?
- What learning or education would support you in creating your desired future?
- What new habits can you put in place to move you towards your ideal future?
- What behavioural trait can you tap into right now to propel you towards your ideal future?
- How can you contribute even more right now?
- How will you acknowledge and celebrate your wins and milestones along the way?
I trust these questions will bring up some invaluable information for you and whoever else you quiz! Now, what do you need to go and do today, tomorrow, and this week?
I mean, knowledge is great, but action is life changing. Fear can often paralyse people so this is a time for action: big action, small action, just take some action! Keep focusing on who you need to be. From that, go and do what you need to do. I promise you will have what you want to have.